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To know Herb Abrams was to like him, or at least be amused by him, as he was a true cartoon character. About five-foot-four-ish, with a small frame, Herb realized that he would never make it in the wrestling business he loved so much, unless he bought his own company. I don't know where he got his money, but man, did he spend it, as he brought in a crew of guys that actually had more talent than the rosters of either of the big two. The guys he brought in had legitimately been huge names and had drawn big money around the globe.

The list reads like a Who's Who of wrestling with Paul Orndorff, Dr. Death (Steve Williams), Don Muraco, Bob Orton, B. Brian Blair, Danny Spivey, Billy Jack Haynes, Sid Vicious, Ken Patera, Colonel DeBeers, David Sammartino, Jimmy Snuka, and even Andre The Giant being only some of the guys he brought in.

Even with all these guys, Herb Abrams was the star. At least that's what he thought. I remember watching his show, which was a pretty difficult thing to do. Despite his prediction, the "Hollywood glitz" was nowhere to be seen, as we toiled away in a dingy nightclub that seated, at most, 300 people, and believe me, there were not usually 300 butts in those seats. Even with all the top names, I was the crowd favorite at the nightclub, even though I was technically a bad guy. Maybe it was the "Welcome to the Jungle" music that Herb had made my entrance theme, or maybe it was the "Unpredictable" moniker that Herb had placed before Cactus Jack - the same one that had worked so well for Johny Rodz.

Anyway, during the show, there was an advertisem*nt for wrestling cookies, which I guess Herb felt was the natural snack food choice of all wrestling fans. Herb's grating voice was doing the talking, as he hailed the benefits of "Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff cookies, Wild Thing Steve Ray cookies, and coming soon, Herbie cookies."

He did the same thing with merchandise. Herb somehow landed a deal for his Blackjack Brawl, not only to be held at the prestigious MGM Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas, but also to be carried live around the country on SportsChannel. What a sight it was to see 200 fans in a 22,000-seat building. But hey, Herb was ready and no one could ever say that Vince McMahon had anything over Herb in the "marketing genius" category. After all, he did air ten commercials for UWF merchandise during the Blackjack Brawl, even if all of them did push only one product - the Mr. Electricity, Herb Abrams T-shirt. I asked his girlfriend after the show how he got the Mr. Electricity nickname, and she put her hands over her head, shook her hips, and gave a very animated, "Because when he plugs it in he really turns me on."

I think it was at the MGM show that Herb's announcing skills really came to the forefront. He had invited me to his suite at the hotel to show me a "big surprise." Herb had an incredible six-room penthouse suite that offered an unbelievable view of Las Vegas. When I got there, Herb had a bandage pressed to his lip, from a wound that he had suffered while wrestling with his buddies in the suite. His surprise - a new UWF championship belt, and a pair of yellow and green ostrich-skin boots that he swore the fans were "going to go nuts over." Well, maybe the fans didn't go nuts, but the wrestlers certainly did, as Mr. Electricity strutted out to the ring with the belt and the ostrich boots. There may have been only a few hundred people in the cavernous arena, but they were Herbie's people, baby, and he was giving them what they came to see.

His announcing that night was truly memorable, as in addition to the fat lip, he was downing co*cktails throughout the show and was totally hammered by the time he interviewed Little Tokyo, who had just won the prestigious Midget's World Title. "Congratulations, Little Tokyo," Herb slurred, "maybe you have some sake tonight to celebrate."

Little Tokyo's eyes grew wide and he replied in astonishment, "How do you know sake?" to which Herb offhandedly said with a shrug, "Oh, I was married to a Jap once."

I've got to hand it to Herb, however, as that night in Las Vegas I got to live out a dream when I wrestled the Superfly Jimmy Snuka in a lumberjack match, in which the other wrestlers were to stand outside the ring to ensure that the action didn't spill outside. There were a few problems with the match, however, as no one ever assigned any lumberjacks to the match, and we had no idea what Herb wanted out of it. As a result, I began asking wrestlers to be lumberjacks, an invitation that many declined, and as a result had a threatening group of lumberjacks consisting of two male wrestlers, two women, two midgets, and three security guards as we got set to go out. Thankfully, Jack Mulligan took control of the situation, and made wrestlers go out to the ring and help us.

The end of the match posed a problem, as Herb didn't want me to lose, and there was no way I was going to let Jimmy lie down for me. As a result, we did the exact thing that lumberjack matches are supposed to prevent - we fought to a double count-out. The lumberjacks were baffled as we fought outside the ring and into the empty stands. "What are you guys doing," B. Brian Blair yelled to us as he gave chase into the twenty-seventh row.

"It's a double count-out," I yelled as the Fly and I continued to trade punches.
"But you can't do that in a lumberjack match," Blair said, laughing in disbelief.
"Hey, it's Herb's show," I said right back, "we can do anything."

A few months later, I read of Herb's passing in a wrestling newsletter. I called over Colette, who had gotten to know Herb pretty well, and began reading the article, but couldn't get through it without laughing in spite of myself. Like his life, Herb Abrams's death had been way over the top. Apparently someone had alerted the police to a disturbance in a high-rise office in Manhattan, and when they got there, they found women screaming in the hallway, and little Herb running around naked, bathed in baby oil, and swinging a baseball bat, with which he was destroying furniture. He was taken into custody and died shortly after from a massive heart attack.

Colette and I sat down and mourned Herb's death by sharing stories of his life and laughing at what a character he had been. I think Herb would have liked it that way.